Discouraged???

Feeling down? Do you wish mediocrity translated into power? Do you ever wish the world of high achievers would just go away? If average means, "best of the worst and worst of the best," do you ever wish the best would just lock themselves in a closet and disappear? Have you ever, just for a passing moment, desired to reward failure? Laugh about it--after all, laughter feels good. Try some of these underachiever ideas, from a strictly pessimistic perspective, and see how they feel:

Performance:
Enjoy doing poorly what others try to do well.

Effort:
I am working hard while frowning for it takes 43 muscles to frown and only 17 to smile.

Procrastination:
To procrastinate is to relax and that benefit is immediate. Remember, a bird in the hand is better than two in the bush.

Self imposed limitations:
Limitations are like walls in a cozy home--I don't have to deal with the weather.

Intelligence:
Never underestimate the power of stupid people in large groups.

Purpose:
I have no purpose unless the purpose of my life is to serve as a warning to others.

Hope:
It's always darkest just before it goes pitch black.

Joy:
That which does not end it now only postpones the inevitable.

Optimism:
Bad stuff happens--ask anyone under the toilet bowl.

Personal growth:
I remain focused only on my present failings, now and forever, for I know what I am aware of is only the tip of the iceberg.

Knowledge:
Clueless is the most popular Sir-name in my workplace.
Success:

The real secret to succeeding is knowing whom to blame.
Attitude:
Beware--attitudes are contagious and mine might be harmful to you.

Relationships:
If you think it's lonely at the top--you should try being evicted from the bottom.

Determination:
The longest journey sometimes goes in circles.

We hope you had a laugh--now click here to make things happen!